Reinventing Oneself

We should resist internalizing external influences without first questioning their origin and determining if they contribute positively to our direction as an individual. Rather than taking ownership of others' standards, beliefs, fears, we should recognize that these are coming from some outside perspective which may not be right for us individually. If we can respect the diversity of individuality and view perspectives from others in such light, we can come to greater appreciation of our own personal uniqueness.

There is much to be said for individuality, and diversity should be celebrated. Ideally there would be a balance between individuality and human interaction. At some extent and degree in the pursuit of individuality, one becomes less unaware of the needs of others, possibly unable to reach out or find common ground. The result of too much focus on "self" is the loss of connection with the collective support of family, friends, groups. This could result in a feeling of isolation.

There is a balance between self actualization and collective interaction, and each person must find themselves at some point that is comfortable and healthy for them. "To thine own self be true" applies in any case where the outside influence would smash your confidence or would inhibit you from taking steps towards your goals.

Your gender transition is a phase of self actualization, where your inner girl is now beginning to evolve outwardly from the boy you've appeared as before. You are reinventing yourself. Your individual identity is in transition, so you are carefully examining the influences and messages you are receiving.

It is and will always be your choice what to accept as valid and/or right for you, and it’s especially important now. In the absence of such consideration, your individual identity would be formed haphazardly, without conscious thought, and perhaps out of balance. If we can each identify for ourselves the type of individuality to which we aspire, it is easier to measure whether any one influence contributes positively.

It's very important to surround ourselves with positive, supportive people who respect our individuality rather than try to hold us back or enforce their way of thinking. The goal is to avoid influences that hurt us, while seeking influences that help us. It may even be necessary to separate from some people and/or situations, and find new people and environments that are conducive to our positive direction and inner peace.

Originally posted in response to: http://genderevolve.blogspot.com/2005/08/resisting-influence.html